The audacity of this man to imagine this and actually consider a hymen to be the deciding factor in the marriage is un-freaking-believable.
You would think that living in the 21st-century people would have left certain ridiculously regressive ideas in the past where they belong. Unfortunately for one bride, her fiance seemed to be stuck in a time before the telephone was invented and believed that a woman's purity lay in her vagina.
Taking to Reddit, the bride wrote that she was 22 and her fiance was 25 when the incident happened. "My fiance proposed to me about 8 months ago. We decided on having a relatively small wedding which is in two days. Everything was going great. He seems absolutely perfect and we are very much in love," she said. "I am a virgin and so is he, he wanted to save it for marriage and I wasn't fussed so I agreed to saving it."
Up till here, it sounds like a typical but romantic love story. That is until you read further. "He has told me earlier that in his family the father checks the virginity of the bride the night before the wedding. I laughed this off as it seriously sounds like a massive joke," the young bride mentioned. But she was in for a rude shock when she realized that he was, in fact, "dead serious." And to make matters worse, she found out that it wouldn't just be her husband-to-be's father, but some male relatives, too, who would be there in the room to find out whether her cherry was unpopped. Yeah, take a minute to process this absurd bunch of words strung together in a sentence.
Not to mention, connecting the hymen to a woman's virginity is also not scientific. According to Healthline, some people can have a vagina but no hymen, some hymens may not break with penetration and some people even lose their hymen during rigorous physical activity like sports or horseriding. Now, back to this bride's story. Her fiance wanted her to spread her legs in front of his father and uncles and proceeded to be surprised by her reaction to his request.
"He wants me, the night before to open my legs up in a small ceremony type thing so his dad can check me while him, his brothers and uncle can watch so that they know I am still 'pure,'" she continued. "I told him fat chance I am going to do that and he was begging to me to go through with it and how important it is for him. He said he knew it was slightly embarrassing for me but his mom did and it will prove how much I love him and that I have nothing to hide anyway as I am still a virgin. I left and he was crying, it was very dramatic tbh."
At the time that she wrote the post, the young woman was panicking because while she had believed they were "genuinely perfect for each other," this demand revealed a side she never in a million years imagined. "I want to call off the whole wedding because of this and never talk to him again. But at the same time its only one thing and other then that we are genuinely perfect for each other and I dont want to spend my life with anyone else and it is very important to him and his family."
If you're worried, don't be because she later posted an update regarding what she decided to do about getting married to him. And she probably realized she made the right call. Initially, she went back to her fiance to discuss the "small matter" of her father checking her hymen like it will whisper her virginity secrets to him. "I told him that his father is not going to look at me and he needs to respect that. He was adamant that it needs to happen and accused me about lying about my virginity," she wrote.
"I was trying to be calm and rational but he was not having it and just became more and more angry. I told him if he really loved me he would stand by me on this and tell his father no to which he slapped me and said he didnt need to prove anything." That was the final straw. "I ended it and left him," she said. "I am currently back at my friends house being miserable and eating pizza which is pretty fun." Now, the fact he slapped her revealed the monster that was hiding behind his sweet mask.
Though it couldn't have been easy to do that, all we can say is you got this! Drown your sorrows in pizza because it's way better than spreading your legs for your now ex-to-be-in-laws. We are proud of you, gal.