A Reddit user shared how her bride friend didn't want her there because her bald head would mess up the aesthetic of the pictures.
You wedding day is something you'll remember for the rest of your life, so it's natural to feel the pressure to make sure it's perfect. But is it justified to cause pain to the ones closest to you in a bid to want that perfection? One bride seems to think so, based on what her close friend, who survived cancer, shared of her experience.
Taking to Reddit, the cancer survivor shared that she had been excited to be her friend's bridesmaid. She said, "I am very good friends with the bride to be, lets call her Karen for simplicity. She got engaged about 1.5 years ago and immediately asked me to be a bridesmaid which I was thrilled about (she was my maid of honor for context)."
However, in the midst of all this, the Reddit user had gotten some "real bad news in the past year and had to undergo radiation and chemotherapy. I don't want to go into details about this because its still very traumatic for me. My hair fell out and I am recovering but my hair is still very short. I have also been very active in the survivor community and have been involved in fund raising and public speaking."
At the time, Karen was extremely supportive of her friend's experience. "She is a nurse and it has been nice to have someone with medical background to chat about some of this issues about this. About 2 weeks ago Karen called me and told me she was going to take me out to celebrate my remission and end of treatment and had a special surprise for me. I agree and we meet up. We go to a spa which was super nice and enjoy some skin treatments, massages, and general pampering," said the woman. But it was at the end of that special day that things took a shocking turn. After the spa date, she was taken to a hair salon which specialized in high-quality wigs.
Taken aback, the cancer survivor wrote, "Karen knows that a lot of the work I have been involves psychological treatment in cancer patients and avoiding the shame associated with hair loss for instance. I politely go through the appointment and even try on some wigs although I was quite upset honestly. I politely decline when she offers to pick one out and try to forget the whole ordeal."
Clearly this was not a done deal for Karen as she called her friend and told her that she "can't be in the bridal party any longer because the minister stated there are too many people in the bridal party. This completely floors me because basically I am her number 2 girl after her sister (who she barely gets a long with)."
Hurt, but wanting to know the reason, the bridesmaid called "around and it although some of the other bridesmaids are reluctant to tell me anything hint at the fact that Karen was worried about how the pictures are going to look with someone with a bald head. I was so upset, I tried to call her but she did not respond. I am thinking I am may not go to the wedding but want to make sure I am not overthinking this. Her wedding is in 2 weeks."
One Reddit user who felt outraged by the bride's behavior told the cancer survivor "Wow that’s horrendous! I hate the fact bridesmaids are to some extent by some brides treated like props for photographs rather than what they should be. Which is as far as I’m concerned the brides closest most important friends and loved ones, to stand with them in support of the bride. Congratulations on you remission. Focus on your self and what makes you happy. Don’t let her bring you down with her attitude. I’d definitely be considering not attending the wedding and ending the friendship because she’s just being horrible and treating people like props."
Despite the bride's betrayal, the woman shared an update saying, "I did speak with Karen and she denied that had anything to do with my hair but based on some things she said I still think that was the reason. Her wedding is actually in a few hours. I told her that I wasn’t going to go. I did tell her that I was upset with her and that I hope one day she can look back and see that she was being selfish. Sadly she told me more or less that I was being selfish."
"Weddings have a funny way of turning people into... well I guess the word is bridezillas. Maybe they amount of stress and pressure is just not good for certain people. Karen is a good person I think who got caught up in herself and unfortunately it may have cost her our friendship. Even though I think she is being selfish I don’t want to hurt her or ruin her wedding day. That’s just not the kind of person I am," she concluded.